Unraveling the Dietary Mysteries of Labrador Retrievers

Rumors are flying that a golden lab named Sandy eats artichokes. “No way,” they all say. But she has been seen scraping the good stuff off the leaves with clenched teeth. You go, girl! Just don’t get caught between Sandy and fresh cabbage leaves. Trampling is never pretty.

The rumors get more ridiculous. Sandy has been spotted pulling weeds with her teeth and eating them. As she works hard to manicure the backyard, her boyfriend, Rocky, on the other side of the cyclone fence mimics her. Now his yard is looking good too.

Sandy is never allowed to have candy, but she can be rather persuasive as she holds an Easter bucket in her mouth, hoping for donations. She finally gives up the bucket and takes a stroll wearing her fake fur bunny ears. Try that, Rocky!

You know it’s a bad day when:

Your dog brings home a bone. You say, “good boy.” Six cop cars surround your neighbor’s house. They discover a body buried in the backyard (minus one femur) and your property value drops by half because you live in a dangerous neighborhood.

From "Secure the Ranch"

“Oh, my God, Solow,” I gasped. I hadn’t a clue how he took the crash. I jumped up and raced out the front door. Herbert had the light on in the garage that looked like Hurricane Josephine had hit it. I rounded the truck and opened the passenger door. Solow practically fell out. I helped him to the ground, noticing his whole backside was crimson. I stifled a cry with my hand. Tears welled up as I embraced the best dog-friend a person could have. Down close, hugging him, he smelled like strawberries.

Once I realized Solow was wearing strawberries and a few other food groups, I relaxed considerably. He had polished off a pound of ground round, a pint of cookies and cream ice cream and a dozen raw eggs. He had been literally rolling in groceries under the dash. Every dog’s dream!


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